loo

There are a large number of people who deserve to be hunted down and executed (Mussolini style), for their crimes against the very bases of society. Chief amongst these are the designers of public toilet paper dispensers. What money grubbing bastard first thought of saving money by making it difficult to get a wad of paper large enough to wipe you backside with? Everything from the much hated oval centre with a stop, to the giant, change infrequently unit with too much friction, these things are simply wrong.

I care about the environment, and I know businesses are pressed for cash these days, but if we forget the common courtesy of giving people an easy way to clean their privates, what sort of society have we become? What use is a thriving economy for people with foulness in the pants, and what environment can thrive where people desperately run water and soap over their faecal-stained hands, I ask you?

But perhaps this goes deeper in history than those designers of paper saving dispensers. Perhaps my ire should be at the TP source, where the unrealistic perforations are added to said loo roll? What dainty Lilliputian has ever used a single sheet of toilet paper for anything, least of all that grimiest of hygienic chores?

So, someone should put out loo roll with perforations realistically spaced. I find that 2 feet spacing should be just fine. 15 of those, and I’d feel clean.